When in the course of human events it becomes necessary for one genius scientist to rule the world she must do so unflinchingly, with complete dedication and a luscious coating of mucus.
I professor doctor Mildred Slugwak Dresselhaus, your benevolent dictator, master of all things scientific, and possessing the power to command armies of both the limaxular and hominid persuasion, do hold these truths to be self-evident:
- Everything is better with SCIENCE
- More of better is superior
- More science makes a superior world
- Only I am fit to lead the science SLUG-o-lution
- You will all bow under my mucus-filled, benevolent, despotic rule
My army of girl scientists will leave a slime trail that will envelop the world, bathing it in my glorious protection and patronage.
In service to hastening the advent of this new oozing order, I grant unto you, the most worthy Ariolimax Eugenius Reginae (Queens of Eugenian Slugs), the privilege of being the first to proclaim me supreme ruler and queen.
For those who seek to counter my inevitable rise, I say this:
Resistance is futile . . . but keep trying . . . you are quite adorable when you struggle. And know that when I crush you under my slime-coated, hardened polycarbonate boot, I do so with love.
The time of science is at hand. Viva Regina Ariolimax Scienticia!